Just for Women

Signs He Won’t Be Asking For a Second Date

He?s pleasant and cordial, not a jerk. But there are signs that there won?t be a second date.

  • You?d agreed to meet for a drink. The waiter brings your drinks, but when he asks if you are ready to order, your date says, ?We?re just having drinks.? If he were interested in spending more time with you, he?d say, ?Check back in a little while? or at least offer to order appetizers.
  • He doesn?t make much eye contact. That means he doesn?t like looking at you. Even if he is shy, if a man thinks you?re attractive, he won?t be able to keep his eyes off you.
  • He doesn?t comment on your attractiveness. An interested guy says, ?You?re much prettier than your pictures,? or even ?Wow! You?re beautiful,? or ?You have such pretty eyes.? He?ll find something to compliment you on.
  • No casual touching. If a guy is attracted to you, he?ll touch your arm or hand, or the small of your back as you walk to the table.
  • He doesn?t smile much. Even if he is shy, a man who wants to make a good impression smiles a lot at what you say and laughs when you attempt something funny.
  • If the waiter asks if you want another drink, your date doesn?t ask you, he just says, ?We?re fine.? Do not, under any circumstance, order another drink unless your date asks. He wants to be polite, but he can get surly if you make him wait while you down another.
  • He doesn?t seem interested in you. He doesn?t ask you questions about your interests or life.
  • No mention of a second date. An attracted man will try to set up the second date during the first, or at least mention it as a possibility. For example, if you mention something you like (e.g., type of movies, food, music or activity) he?ll say, ?Next time we will go there/try that.?
  • He can?t wait to get the check. He may chase down the waiter if it isn?t coming fast enough.
  • He accepts your offer to contribute to the check. Bad sign. This shows he has no interest in you romantically.
  • He doesn?t walk you to your car.
  • He shakes your hand as you part and says something like, ?It was nice to meet you.?

Most of these alone don?t mean there?s no second date coming. However, if there are several ? or heaven forbid, all of them ? just try to get out of there as quickly and pleasantly as possible.

Don?t take it personally. Just know it isn?t a match and move on. Next!

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R.L. Morgan

R.L. Morgan - The Dating Goddess - brings you her experience from the front line -- having dated 73 men in 2 years after her 20-year marriage broke up. Read her insights and lessons to help you date more effectively. She's a bestselling author, Oprah guest, and speaker. Read all of the Dating Goddess's wisdom at Adventures in Dating After 40, http://www.DatingGoddess.com.

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