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Climb Out of Your Relationship Rut

by Kevin Countermine

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Have you ever been in a long-term relationship, or about to enter that "long term" stage and then suddenly things start to slip away? Most relationships start to go down hill upon reaching this stage of longevity. Some can work through this stage and others may not be able to get through that rough spot in the relationship. We may ask questions like: "Why does this happen?" or "It used to be fun, but now it's not the same," or "What's happened to us?"

The New Stage

Remember way back when in the beginning of the relationship, when there were those phone calls that lasted for hours on end, the frequent gifts, and the seemingly monthly anniversaries? During this "new" stage, we appreciated each other and what one meant to the other. We were almost amazed by each other through the displays of love and affection and how much we cared for each other.

What Happens?

Most times in a relationship that starts to go down hill, it is sometimes due to a lack of appreciation. We still love our partners, and in most cases even more than during the early stages of the relationship, but maybe we don't show them or let them know as much as we used to. We begin to take one another for granted. When this happens, things start to take a turn for the worst because we have a need to feel wanted and appreciated, not just to be taken for granted and to be understood as being loved. We need to hear it and see it.

Fix This Bump in the Road!

Just think to yourself what your partner means to you. Think of how wonderful they are, and don't focus on their faults or problems, because we all have ours. Now think how much better your life has been since your partner has been in your life. Now, ask yourself this, "When was the last time I told my partner this?" You see, we see each other so often and have been together for so long that we start to think that "they know I love them." On the contrary, the exact opposite is true. If someone stops saying that they love you and stops showing it, would you question whether or not that they still are in love with you?

Show Your Partner that You Love Them

You must let your partner know that you love them and that you appreciate them. It doesn't take anything major, just the little, sweet things. Like a card, or a little love note placed where they can find it. Just the little things can make that much more of a difference. This is true because a loving relationship is not something that will always be there. It is something that we should appreciate and realize just how important we are to each other. Some go through their whole life and still aren't able to find a loving relationship. Those of us who are in one must not take it for granted, or we may become one of those endlessly searching for love.

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