Recently, I met with a woman who has an interesting story. It seems that she and her husband have been separated for many years. They have gone through almost all the steps of the divorce, and there remains only one step to finalize the divorce: taking the signed documents to the judge to pronounce the divorce final. And the interesting thing is that she has held onto those documents for 2 years! She – and her husband – have lived in limbo for 2 years!
As she told her story, she began to sort out the reasons for not completing the divorce, which is that she is 59 and fearful about re-entering the dating/mating scene.
“I’m just too old! And I don’t know anything about dating anymore – it has just been too long! Everything has changed!” She was nearly in tears as she told her story.
She was stuck in one of the 5 deadly myths about being a mature age and starting over in love.
Myth #1: It just can’t happen.
It’s not true that a life of love and intimacy is only for the young and beautiful. All it takes is that one person, and using the laws of attraction, you can draw that person to you.
Myth #2: I don’t know enough.
Sure, the dating scene has changed since you were a teen, but the people you are likely to want to date – people of your own age – were born and raised in your era. This means that they learned to date for the first time just when you did, so they will have the same understanding of how to date and relate as you do.
Myth #3: I’m too old to start again.
And as for those things that are different now, in spite of the tired cliché “You can?t teach an old dog new tricks,? you can learn all you need to know about dating in this decade. In fact, your maturity and life experience will help you to learn all you need to know – and very quickly.
Myth #4: I will just get my heart broken.
Actually, I can?t promise that this won?t happen, but I can promise that you will recover, and that you will learn from the experience. Life is risky, and when we put ourselves out there with the intent to love, we are vulnerable. But the alternative is to live a shriveled half-life. And you can learn how to date consciously so that you can balance your head with your heart in your relationships.
Myth #5: Love now could never be as sweet as it once was.
This is surely one of the biggest myths. Falling in love at any age feels just the same as it did when we were 16. Humans never get too old to feel that zing! And the sex, even with our aging bodies, can actually be far better, far more fulfilling than when we were young.
Like a fine wine, life and – more importantly – love can become more wonderful because of – not in spite of – aging. There is a desert wine known as late harvest wine. This wine is created from select grapes that are left to hang on the vine late into the season; the grapes are affected by Botrytis – the “noble rot” – that causes them to become dry and shriveled on the vine – and highly concentrated with sugar. When harvested by hand, pressed, and fermented, these grapes produce a sweet, luscious, honeyed, nectar-like wine. Late harvest love can be as delicious and satisfying as this wonderful late harvest wine.
So go for life. Go for love. Drink deep from that sweet, luscious, honeyed, nectar-like cup! It?s never too late for love, and it’s worth any risk!