I’m not going to waste any time here. So here it goes. One word. MANIPULATION.
One of the biggest mistakes people make when they think they’re being cheated on is allowing themselves to be manipulated. This is where you start to think that you’re being cheated on, but your better half convinces you that you’re not. What you need to know is that men and women manipulate differently.
How Women Manipulate
Women manipulate men physically. They do this by using their bodies (think SEX here). A woman can pretty much get a man to think or do whatever they want by offering sex, or at least physical contact. For example, if you’re a man and your woman starts to think that you’re “catching on” to what she’s doing behind your back, she’ll offer herself physically as a method of changing your mind. Maybe she’ll have sex with you. Maybe she will just let you put your arm around her. Maybe she’ll just let you touch her while she’s sitting next to you on the couch watching TV. In any event, she’ll offer you some sort of physical interaction that will make you think “gee, maybe she isn’t cheating on me”. If you’re a man, remember this….women control almost all physical encounters. After all, if a woman says “NO”, it’s rape.
How Men Manipulate
The same rules don’t apply to men. Now on the other side of the coin, men will manipulate by EMOTION. A man can get a woman to think or do whatever he wants by pretty much just saying what she wants to hear (or doing some little romantic trick like sending flowers). A man can sweep a woman off her feet with just words. A simple “I love you” or “you’re everything I’ve ever wanted and more” can emotionally melt most women.
So these are the things you need to watch out for. If you think your lover is cheating on you, and then all of a sudden they do something “to make everything alright”, you my friend have just been manipulated. I know of men (who’s wives or girlfriends were cheating on them) who bought expensive jewelry for their woman just because of some type of physical contact. I know of women (who’s husbands or boyfriends were cheating on them) who dropped the whole notion of infidelity just because of receiving flowers or getting a loving message left on their answering machine. You need to be completely aware of manipulation like this in your relationship. If you’ve been emotionally abused or physically neglected for a time, and then all of a sudden something changes that makes you happy and relieved, odd’s are you’re being manipulated. Some women call this a “mercy …”. Some men call this “throwing her off the trail”. In any event, you’re letting your NEEDS open the door for your lover to keep cheating on you, undetected.
Manipulation is a very important key to look out for. If you’re “starving” for something in your relationship and then all of a sudden you get “fed”, well, there’s a reason for that. And that reason is that your lover may be thinking you’re “on to them”. Manipulation is the FIRST thing they’ll use to shut you up. Watch out for it and don’t fall for it! Remember what was said here!