Before you can physically arouse a woman you need to make her “want to be aroused”. To get most women in the mood, a man needs to “make love to her all day long.”
Be nice, loving, and thoughtful and call her in the middle of the day just to say you’re thinking of her. Buy her something for no reason. Women need to know you care. They connect naturally through the heart. Men are generally more outward–work and play oriented. They’re focused and don’t usually think about their relationship as much as women do.
Men, if you want her to be more enthusiastic about having sex with you, you need to make love to her all day long by showing her you care. Put a note in your appointment book to call her a couple of times each week and tell her you love her. When you see her, do little thoughtful things that tell her she’s special to you.
Touching her in nonsexual ways is part of making love. Looking at her with love in your eyes. Compliment her. Giving her soft kisses. Being thoughtful, sensitive and physically tender sets the mood for you to become sexual later. Don’t rush or make her feel pressured because she might shut down. Especially if your habit is to grope and grab. Let go of expectations and simply feel love for her. She’ll begin to warm up to you because, for her, sex and love go hand-in-hand.
editor’s note: The suggestions above may not work for all couples. Sometimes a medical problem or depression is the underlying cause of loss of sex drive. Talk to your partner about it, she may be able to tell you what she thinks the cause is.