“It’s about freakin’ time”, someone said. And I have no arguments for you there.

Better late than never though. So let’s fix the situation.

The “Big Four”, in principle, are the most basic, fundamental factors that decide whether a woman is attracted to you or not.

Get them right, and women WILL respond powerfully to you. Ignore them (or worse?be ignorant OF them) and you could spend the rest of your life wondering what the problem is.

So obviously, this is one of the more important newsletters I’ve written to you.

Before I break down the “Big Four” for you, I want to offer a sincere caveat: There is NO WAY this newsletter is going to cover every single nuance of what these concepts entail.

That’s fine for now, because my goal in writing to you today is not to cover minute details but rather to give you a “big picture” view that provides a valid framework to work with as you discover more and more how to deserve what you want.

After all, quite literally everything I talk about or write about hinges on the “Big Four”.

So with out any further intro, here they are:

Masculinity

Last time we talked about how to “man up” in exactly the way women want us to. That’s the first component of the “Big Four”.

Men and women are designed to attract each other. This is so fundamentally simple a concept, yet one that is so easily clouded in today’s world.

Men are softening their demeanors, taking the edge off the strength that inherently makes them men. Instead, they are giving in to temptation to become more feminine in the name of “sensitivity”.

You, as a man who desires feminine, attractive women must absolutely, positively resist feminization of your personality and of your lifestyle.

If you read that as “being insensitive” or in any other misogynistic way, you’ve been hornswaggled, hoodwinked, bamboozled, flimflammed and any other synonym for “deceived” that you’ve ever heard in an old cartoon before.

Seriously.

Being masculine is NOT synonymous with acting like some under-evolved “caveman” who rapes, pillages and is otherwise responsible for every form of pain on Earth.

Be the guy who leads, plans, protects and decides like a man. Put aside “softness” and “weakness” while retaining heartfelt benevolence towards all.

And watch as women become drawn to you like a magnet to steel.

Confidence

If you know what you want, and fail to take action because of fear or indecision, then you are-by definition-lacking confidence.

A woman wants a man who leads, and contrary to what you may have heard elsewhere she wants a man who takes charge of his own destiny and SELECTS her.

That’s right, YOU SHOULD BE THE CHOOSER. Offloading that responsibility onto women, or dismissing it entirely as mythical is a COP OUT.

As a man who is comfortable in the fact that he deserves what he wants, your inner-game must be together enough for you to ACT UPON that.

In concept, confidence is nothing more complicated than a firmly held belief in your ability to succeed at a high level while dismissing the possibility of failure (preferably entirely).

So at the baseline, confidence is absolutely necessary in order for you to even meet the women you want, let alone demonstrate your ability to provide a balanced environment for the relationship to grow in.

This segues nicely into the next factor?

Inspiring Confidence

Once you’ve achieved a level of confidence that enables a woman to believe in you the way you believe in yourself (which carries an important cause/effect relationship) then you are ready to affect something in your relationships with MOTOS (Members Of The Opposite Sex) that is intensely powerful.

It’s like this: Women want SAFETY.

Unfortunately, the man women most need to be protected from is the ONE THEY’RE WITH.

If you drive like a maniac when she’s riding shotgun, openly flirt with other women in her presence, waffle over decisions, have absolutely zero ambition and have no clue what to do with her when you pick her up (let alone when it’s TIME TO KISS HER), guess what? She’ll have no sense of stability around you.

Not knowing what to expect next is fun for women when it comes to special surprises, unannounced plans and other such lightweight moments that contribute to “being unpredictable”.

And granted, if you are boring and unexciting that’s NO FUN for women. In fact, it could be argued effectively that “Being Fun and Interesting” could have made this list a “Big Five”.

But what we’re covering here is something deeper. YOU are like a bastion of strength, no matter what happens or when it happens.

This builds the all-important measure of trust in her heart and mind.

When you have successfully caused a woman to believe in you the way you believe in yourself-no matter what the situation-then you have succeeded at INSPIRING CONFIDENCE. She can rest in your presence. Without that, she’ll resent you–if not become flatly repulsed.

Character

This is one of the most misunderstood terms in the English language.

Don’t kid yourself. “Character” is not to be confused with “being a character”.

Simply putting away routines and openers does NOT equal “character-based” seduction like some “natural game” proponents would have you believe.

“Character” is rock-solid stability at your very core. It’s doing what’s right simply because it’s the right thing to do, not because of “what’s in it for you”.

A man of character promises only what he is capable of delivering, and often delivers more than he promises out of sheer overachievement.

He does what he says he is going to do, and avoids deception.

He is all about building others up rather than tearing them down in a weak attempt to make himself appear “better”. The man of character realizes that’s neither ethical nor effective, even.

Mostly, the man of character has his identity figured out and his conscience is okay with that. And when that’s all set, you’ll NEVER, EVER have to ask “What do I do next?” “Character” is “seductive” by definition.

Do you get the sense that each separate component of the “Big Four” is in fact the component of a larger, cohesive concept? If so, then YES?you are 100% correct. It’s very much as if they each contribute to and are in fact are amplified by one another.

And that “larger concept” is, in case you haven’t figured it out, HOW TO BE A GREAT MAN.

And GREAT MEN attract and deserve GREAT WOMEN.

What it all comes down to is this: A GREAT WOMAN wants a man who has his part covered so that she can be FREED UP to be the feminine woman she was born to be. You make her feel like a woman, and you are that man.

Miss out on that, and it’s back to sitting around figuring out how two neuter creatures are supposed to attract each other?which of course is a pointless exercise. Unless, of course, you’re okay with a neuter woman. Or one who “wears the pants”.

But I’m telling you, show me a woman who “wears the pants” and I’ll show you a BITTER woman, not a BETTER woman.

So why make her do both jobs? Why make her fulfill upon the masculine and the feminine?

Or are you really okay with having the feminine part covered yourself?

If so, good luck with that.

But my vision for you is much, much more noble than that. All you have to do is visualize it for yourself.

That’s fine for now, because my goal in writing to you today is not to cover minute details but rather to give you a “big picture” view that provides a valid framework to work with as you discover more and more how to deserve what you want.
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To sum up the responses…a lot of men relied on smiles and eye contact, a surprisingly large number of them will just tell you.

Below are all the responses:

I go out of my way to make eye contact and smile, and try to get a vibe from her.

A lot of it is eye contact and tone of voice.

From body-language, from common friends etc.

I catch her eyes and wait for her to look away. If she doesn’t look away after maybe 2 seconds, I grin my boyish grin at her and wait for her reaction.

Look in my eyes, flirtatious behavior.

Eye contact

Eye contact, smile, flowers.

My “casual” attention and attentiveness

From the look of my EYE ..

Eye contact and a particular smile

Call her on the phone and tell her.

She must look in my eyes and she will know that I’m interested in her.

Try to “accidentally” bump into her and strike up a conversation.

She would see me smile coyly at her . . . occasional glances.

I would ask about her from her friends, and start hanging out where she hangs out.

Talk to her

The way I look at her.

I seem to pay a lot of attention to her.

I would stare at her.

My eyes will show the way I feel. There is no way to hide that in the eyes.

Making eye contact every time I see her.

If she constantly catches me looking at her, even if I look away when she looks. If I smile and say hello as we pass.

She could have one of her friends ask. Or she may just see the way you look at her.

I’d tell her fiends I thought she was cute, or I’d go up to her and introduce myself.

I’ll stare at her

Slightly prolonged eye contact and warm smile.

I’ll start talking to her.. Go out of my way to see her. In a group, I tune everyone out and pay more attention to her.

Smile at her when you see her, a couple of times. Be extra polite to her, a special greeting, happen to always take the lift when she does, happen to always go to the same lunch spot. Try to get a friend to give her something nice, try to get a friend to initiate a date.

Eye contact smile

Wink at her

Eye Contact

Intuition

Maybe some of my friends had told her

By making constant eye contact.

Ask her out for dinner, a drink or some place where we could go and sit and chat. Just to get to know a little about each other.

She probably wouldn’t

I would try to glance at her regularly and show here I am still paying attention to her. Basically FLIRT!!!.

I speak to her for an extended length of time even when I have the chance to speak with others.

The way you look at her

Simply by making eye contact with her and smile.

Special lingering eye contact with lots of smiles.

I would first try to establish eye contact when I see her in hopes that it can start from there then eventually I would approach this women and try to make small talk.

A sweet smile

I guess I would give little hints that I liked her. Start talking and flirting a little with her. Maybe even doing something unusual so she would laugh or see that I was a decent guy and fun to be around.

If I’ve never talked to her then I wouldn’t be interested in her

I don’t think she would.

I WOULD FLIRT WITH HER AND SMILE A LOT

By telling her.

Talk to her and tell her

I try to look at her when she’s looking at me and smile at her. If I think she didn’t understand the next time our eyes met I simply wink at her.

Keep looking back at her

Give a warm smile.

Would smile and introduce myself to her and have a short lite conversation at first then tell her it was very nice to meet her and that I would let her get back to what ever she was doing.

Eye contact

I would bounce my eyes her way every so often and let her catch me looking then after a while I’d go talk to her

I use quick glances

I believe your eyes can tell her

Put a note in her book bag (college student here)…then talk to her the next day in class.

Have her catch you looking at her.

I would let her know.

Eye contact

Smile

She would have to notice me glancing her way every now and then

I guess I usually try to get her to notice me by doing things that attract more attention to me.

She catches you looking at her

I will glance at her every now and then .

I would have to walk up to her and surprise her with a rose and ask her out on a date.

Send her some flowers with a romantic gesture in it and with, of course, my phone number

I make eye contact and give my best smile and possibly a wink.

I think by the way I look/act when she is around. The typical peak or “I’m looking in her direction at something, when she really knows I’m looking at her”.

Look into her eyes and smiles

Eye contact and a smile

I’m constantly looking at her. Maybe a small smile and then look away.

Eye contact, a smile

I’d be looking at her a lot and smiling at her a lot. Body language.

Body language

You check her out. Smile at her. Try to be around her.

Just make an add in a newspaper

I try not to let out a signal.

I would look at her. I would talk to her. I would spend time with her.

Make eye contact

I would look at her a lot and maybe smile at her and then go and talk to her.

If I’m “watching” her occasionally. If I’m in her “area” often.

By getting caught staring at her from across a room

She would catch me staring at her longer than I’m suppose to.

We see each other every day

Go up to her and talk to her, send a note (i.e. secret admirer)

I often look at her…but turn my look away shyly when she looks at me…she can see that split second of head turning…and the shy look afterward. That means that I’ve grown fond of her!

The way I smile at her

I’d tell her.

I’d walk up to her and ask her out.

Just by me looking at her, I’m a shy guy, so it’s a little obvious when I’m interested in someone.

I smile at her

I go out of my way to make eye contact and smile, and try to get a vibe from her.
/p

So, you’re out there, looking for romance. It’s not easy, either. How sure are you that you’re looking in the right place? Maybe while you’re busy trying to meet people at the laundromat, Mr. or Miss Right is at work. Think about it. Romance can come from anywhere. Finding it is the hardest game you’ll ever play. And more often than not, it shows up where you’re not looking for it. That can really suck.

I’m not one who believes a lot in luck or fate, but you can’t deny that some of the most romantic stories you’ve ever heard happened by chance – the guy who met his wife at the party he wasn’t supposed to go to, or the woman who met the love of her life in the garage on the one day she decided to drive to work. So, as an idea, luck has some merit.

Just great. So you DO have to be lucky to find love.

Not really. Unlike horse racing, this is one of those areas where you can make your own luck. All you have to do is be in the right place at the right time. Sounds easy enough, right?

So, where do you look for romance?

Nowhere. And everywhere.

It’s that simple. I’m not saying to walk around with flowers and candy on standby. Do you really want to sit back in a rocking chair someday and tell your grandkids that you were trying to pick women up at the bookstore when you met Grandma? Doubtful. I’m also not saying to sit around at home and give up on meeting people. Just realize that romance can be just around the corner, or at your doorstep. You just have to be willing to walk into it or open your door.

Dating services, as cheesy as they are, have been known to work once in a while. So have personals ads and meeting people on the Internet. Now, I’m sure you’re making a face. Shaking your head and thinking that only losers sink that low. And that any of those three is a sure-fire way to meet some psycho or freak. But I’m sure you know someone who tried the traditional ways of meeting people and still met weirdos and freaks. If you’re alone and don’t want to be, this is really no time to be stubborn. If you’re at your wit’s end, you may want to give them a try.

The other thing you may have to throw out are your rules – you know the ones –

• “I’ll never date a short guy.”
  
• “I don’t date at work.”
  
• “I won’t go out with anyone I meet at the supermarket.”

If you accept that finding love is at least partly luck, you’re not helping yourself by eliminating sides of the dice you’re rolling. Your lover man may be in the cube next to you, or half an inch shorter than you’ve always dreamed. Your dream girl may be the bartender instead of the cutie on the dancefloor. Keep your eyes and your mind open. It doesn’t guarantee that you’ll find romance, or love, but it will definitely increase your chances.

So keep looking where you’re looking. And where you’re not looking. Leave yourself open, but don’t look desperate. That’s never good.

Oh, and if you happen to meet a few psychos along the way, don’t give up.

And don’t blame me.

In my research for my book, I discovered the two reasons that a man doesn’t get married:

1. He’s not ready.
2. You’re not the right one.

That’s it, there only two. You could be the right one, but if he’s not ready, he’s very likely to let you go. He may come back, but by then, you’ve continued with your quest and found a man who is ready. You see, men don’t fantasize about getting married. They know it will happen one day, as part of the process of growing up. But they usually don’t want to rush it unless they’re the type that lives in the moment and doesn’t pay much attention to the consequences of their actions. Most men are outward; they set and achieve goals, solve problems, accomplish things in the world. They don’t sit around and day-dream about what life will be like when they’re married. They’re too focused on being successful and creating security for the future. It’s the hunter instinct. Plan ahead and make sure everyone is safe and well-fed. If either of those things aren’t handled, he’s considered a failure. Not okay for a hunter. That’s why most men need to have a secure, stable job before they “take the plunge.”

So when a man gets old enough to think maybe he should start considering settling down, getting married and having a family, it’s a nuts-and-bolts decision, not a fantasy-come-true. Yes, he likes being married, likes the home a wife creates, his stature that grows among his peers and in his community and the stability it brings. But he also sees marriage as the time he gives up his freedom. Freedom to come and go as he pleases, to have sex with lots of beautiful women (his fantasy, by the way), and to focus on his career and himself. The biggest challenge, however, is the decision to take on the economic and emotional responsibility of another adult (you) and however many children the two of you have. For him, it’s all about needing to be a good enough provider to take care of your needs, a house, two cars, and the expenses that grow as children grow. This is huge for most men. That’s why, even though he may not want to even consider not having you in his life, he can’t seem to get the proposal out of his mouth, or if he does, he breaks the engagement, too overwhelmed with what it means to take on all of those responsibilities.

What does all this mean for you? Mostly, you get to feel what’s going on for him and how different his view of marriage is from yours. But even more, he now knows you understand what he’s going through, and that you won’t pressure him, at least for a while, so he can prepare himself for what he says he wants…to be married to you, the women he loves. This will make you indispensable to him because, more than anything he needs to feel understood. If he’s the right one, give him time, let him know you support him in what he has to go through, give him the understanding that he craves and he’ll think you’re the most amazing woman on the planet.

That’s why, if you want to take things further with a woman, you need to show her your best on the very first date. And in actual fact, there are 5 things that men consistently do on first dates that totally destroy their chances of seeing the woman again, and the worst part is they think they’re doing it right!

Avoid the following 5 mistakes to increase your chances of success on your first date:

Mistake #1 – Buying Gifts

Bringing chocolate or flowers on a first date isn’t the best idea – especially if you’ve just met the woman! She’s there to get to know YOU. Women are always asking themselves “what does THAT mean?” And in this case it’s, “He bought me flowers because he likes me, but he doesn’t even know anything about me yet! A little suspicious.

Mistake #2 – Being Mr. Serious

When in the presence of a potential date, men often become boring, instead of keeping up the friendly vibe they have with their friends. They won’t make jokes or laugh with the woman, they won’t play around like they do with their friends and they generally take things a little too seriously. Why do men change their behavior around women, often without even realizing they’re doing it? Because they fear losing their only chance with the girl of their dreams, they try and play the safe side, which results in a “Mr. Serious”.

Mistake #3 – Conducting and Interview

When men become “Mr. Serious” they often fall into “job interview conversation mode.” Make sure you reserve questions like, “So where do you work?” or “How many brothers and sisters do you have?” for the future, after you’ve already had a lot of fun and made the sparks fly. Instead, talk about your hobbies, interesting stories and fun stuff. Avoid anything too deep for a long period of time. On a first date, it can make things a little depressing. Talk like you’ve known each other for years (as if you don’t need to do the awkward 20-questions quiz.) Of course you can ask basic questions, but never make it the main focus of your date. Focus on fun.

Mistake #4 – Being Too Needy & Direct

Without realizing it, many guys turn their dates off by trying a little too hard. For example: Men will lean into a woman’s personal space, and ask, “so do you like me?” or constantly change his opinion to seek her approval and make her like him. Big mistake. Ironically, it’s leaning back, staying cool and calm, being a little cheeky, interesting, mysterious and comfortable with yourself that actually gets a woman’s attention and keeps her interested.

Mistake #5 – Going to Boring Places

If your date finds the night boring, you’re finished. When it comes to having fun on first dates, nothing is more important than what you do. And while dinners and movies are nice, it’s really hard to leave a great impression in these settings. Why? Because they set a very “proper tone” that’s hard to turn into fun and playful. And unless you’re a super funny, intelligent and interesting guy, dinner and movie dates just aren’t the best place to take your date. Instead, go to fun places like mini-golf parks, carnivals, parks, or even better, come up with your own unique and fun ideas.

So in essence, while there are many factors to having a successful date, a great date idea really helps you do many of them naturally! Remember, where you take a woman on a first date can be the difference between a great night and a dating disaster! Choose wisely!

1. She said too much. Men tell me that many women go into way too much detail about their past relationships, especially of a sexual nature. Men don’t want to hear it, even if they ask you to tell them.
2. She talked about all the bad things every man ever did to her…and she blames me. Men hate it when a woman blames them for what some jerk before them did to her. It’s like they’re guilty until proven innocent.
3. She’s angry at men. She’s got a chip on her shoulder about men and carries a bit of anger toward all men…simply because they’re men. This is a variation on #2 but it’s about men in general, rather than specific men and incidences.
4. She lacks all the qualities he’s looking for. Most any woman’s list of expectations regarding men, marriage, and relationships is pretty long. Consequently, most women settle for a man that lacks some of the qualities she was looking for. A man’s list is very short. For example, if a man’s list of what he’s looking for in that special woman is four items long, if one item is missing, that’s one/quarter of what he needs. If it’s missing, he’s gone…without an explanation.
5. She has sex too soon. Yes, most men want to get a woman into bed as soon as possible. But, if a woman he’s really interested in has sex with him too soon, he quits
   calling because he figures if she did it with him so easily, she probably did with others, equally soon in the relationship. It’s a double standard, of course, but I’m just reporting the news. And ladies, don’t say, “I don’t usually have sex so soon”. He won’t believe it, even if it’s true. He’s heard it before. He wants to think you’re kind of pure, and maybe only had sex with the few men you were truly in love with. Wait until you think this man could become Mr. Right. He’ll respect your desire to wait. If not, isn’t it nice to find out now.

Those are some reasons nice men don’t call back. I hope this sheds some
light on why men do those frustrating things they do. Good luck… and enjoy.

What was the biggest complaint about the younger kid? If you had a standard relationship, the biggest strain was ALWAYS that your younger sibling hung around too much.

There you were, trying to play video games, and he was always butting in, usually being embarrassing for some unplaced reason. You wanted to go to the movies with your friends, and she wanted to come, and your mom made you take him.

It was so ANNOYING! You had this clinging human that you couldn’t get rid of, you couldn’t get a MOMENT for YOURSELF!

I mean, why didn’t he hang out with his OWN friends? Why couldn’t he GET HIS OWN LIFE, and just leave you alone?

Guess what. You are your younger brother.

Many guys make the CRUCIAL error of opening themselves up too soon to new women in their life, ESPECIALLY very attractive and sought-after ones.

You?ve been there. So have I.

Everything is going great, and one day it’s so great you can?t help yourself. You feel the NEED to SHARE these strong feelings with the woman. You are so HAPPY you can?t contain yourself.

And then it all goes wrong.

Maybe she just seems to cool and slowly lose interest. Maybe she gives you the dreaded friend treatment, or she might even just blow you off completely.

And it doesn’t make any sense. Everything was wonderful, and then suddenly it wasn’t, and you have NO IDEA WHY.

Guess what. You are your younger brother.

The SECOND you open yourself up like this to a lady, she’s thinking “Here we go again.” Even if you haven’t yet, she’s been through this before.

Of course she has. Attractive women have guys crawling all over them every day, and she has to know how to get rid of the rejects quickly. Usually she can tell the weak and self-conscious a mile away, but every once and awhile a guy sneaks past her defenses.

She enjoys her time with him, he seems cool and in control, and then he has to tell her how he FEELS.

Not a trait of the strong confident type. That by itself isn’t what does the relationship in, but it’s what often FOLLOWS that a girl will avoid like a Roseanne bikini collection.

The guy CHANGES overnight from the confident man she enjoyed her time with, into a needy wussy over-sensitive puddle of spongy goo. Probably at least ONE of these guys in her past turned into a STALKER after she lost attraction and gave him walking papers.

Not to say YOU will - God I hope not - and if you’ve got a patient lady she may wait to find out which guy shows up the next few times - the confident man she fell for, or a self-help sensitive whiner who isn’t happy without constant affirmation.

But you spill the beans too soon, and she’ll start thinking of ways out.

This isn’t to say you can never express how you feel; there’s a time in every relationship when it?s appropriate. It’s just that most guys skip ahead WAY too early. And it gives the girls the heebie-jeebies.

Just like it would you.

One time I was dating two women, trying to decide which one to have a deeper relationship with, if either. One of them, on our second or third date, crawled between my legs when we got home and begged me to MARRY her. I mean pleaded, cried, everything.

Guess how long it took me to drop her? Whatever you just said, it wasn?t that long.

She FREAKED ME OUT and I started thinking about all the ways she must be damaged to be that needy. It’s not attractive at all. I went from pitched-tent to frightened turtle in negative 8 seconds.

And you KNOW you’d do the same if someone you barely know said something like that to you.

Start telling a girl too early how much you like her, sometimes even just saying how much you like your TIME together, and the lady has the same reaction.

She goes from snowy-morning pert to steam-bath smooth in the same negative 8.

Not to mention, even if she reacts well to it, the thrill is gone. The mystery is dead, the chase has ended, you?ve got NO power in the relationship anymore and she knows it.

Like with your kid bro, she might evilly give you little missions just to see what kind of power she has over you, just to get the rush and the giggles out of it.

That is NO way to go through a relationship.

Now if, on the other hand, things are going well and she’s starting to want to hear some committal words and you HOLD BACK, the tension and mystery just increases.

I remember one girl I absolutely adored said something shocking to me after a tiff - she said she was very insecure around me because she didn?t even know if I liked her at all. And she LOVED that excitement.

Talk about an eye-opener.

I’m not advocating you play with the lady’s emotions - at least not much - but I AM saying that it’s a LOT better to wait too long than to speak too soon. You retain that sexy control, you have the power in the relationship, and she finds you more attractive that way anyway.

Certainly compared to all the Mr. Rogers clones she’s had to avoid all her life.

Plus, it says all the right things about YOU and your time, that you have a fruitful independent life outside her presence, that you like being with her (or else you wouldn’t be there) but also that you’re ok on your own.

No woman wants to be a mom. She wants to be a LOVER, not a babysitter.

And now, this next part might take some getting used to: it goes against most of what you’ve ever been taught.

DON’T COMPLIMENT HER.

Oh, the occasional comment is alright, as long as it’s sincere and not forced. It’s also alright to use as an ice-breaker when meeting ladies, before she knows who you are, the cocky humor has to be very delicately balanced or you come off like an a-hole.

But when a lady I’m seeing is fishing for a compliment, I usually deflect that away in a funny style.

Say you?re getting ready to go out and she asks “Do I look fat in this dress?” I will often answer with “I wasn’t going to say anything, but?” and get a laugh, a slap on the arm, a free pass on the most dreaded question in datingdom and a turned-on woman.

Take the other route and do the usual cave, saying something like “No, you look great” or “You look great in everything baby.” and it sounds like she FORCED you into that answer.

She can control you. She doesn’t want to be able to control you. She wants a MAN, dammit!

Again, far enough along you can get away with giving a random real compliment, even in response to a fishing question - if you’re independence is strong and what you say sounds - and IS – sincere.

Just don’t overdo it.

On a similar line of thinking, DO NOT go out of your way to buy expensive dinners and presents early in the relationship. If your first dinner is at Spago, she’s gonna feel like you’re reaching to impress her.

Or, worse, that you’re trying to buy her.

That’s not to say you can’t have a first date at Spago, but if you do, it needs to be CLEAR that you were going there anyway, and she’s welcome to come along if she likes.

If you go out of your way for her, she’ll know it, and she won’t like it.

Unless you have millions of dollars to play with. Then it MIGHT work, with certain women.

Otherwise, you’ll just come off as someone desperate for her attention that doesn’t have anything but gifts to offer. Doesn’t make you look like the most attractive puppy in the litter (ironically, puppies that take women to Spago invariably do very well).

So in short, DON’T BLOW YOUR LOAD TOO EARLY.

Of course, to get to the stage of WITHOLDING that inexorable urge to tell the woman everything you feel about her, you have to get the woman first. You can get lucky now and again, or you can slowly learn the mistakes that everyone has to make, you can skip all that by learning the skills from someone who’s ALREADY made the mistakes and now knows what to do to get past all the tests women throw at men.

Yes, Henry Kissinger finally has a dating guide.

Ha, I?m talking about me. You can learn literally HUNDREDS of secrets about the psyche that women take into dating, and how to make them work for you by reading my books The Seduction Science System, 3rd Edition, or any of a score of other books available on my website with enough tips to make Don Juan take notice. Until next time.

Regards,

Derek Vitalio

http://www.seductionscience.com