Talk about Yourself

Take as much time as you need to build your profile, there is no need to rush through this process. Read each section carefully and be sure to give as much information as you can. In the “talk about yourself” section be sure to have more then just a just couple sentences. You must remember that potential dating partners are reading this info to get a feel of whether or not the two of you might “hit it off”. So tell them about yourself. Your likes, your dislikes etc.

Be Specific

You want to standout from the crowd. There are lots, and I mean lots of “I’m a 26 year old SWF/SWM who likes movies and swimming”. You need to be more specific so you can create an interest in you. After all you are creating a sales page for yourself. What are your favorite movies, t.v. shows, music, singer, group, etc? Do you have any hobbies? Play sports? Yes? Then tell people about it. Do you have a great sense of humor? Then show people that great sense humor.

Be Positive about Personal Ads

Remember that being negative is not an attractive trait in a date. Be positive about yourself. You really don’t want to say things like “I’m doing this on a dare” or “I’m just trying this out for the hell of it”. You won’t be taken seriously with this type of comment. And, don’t be concerned about looking for a date or romance online, you won’t be thought of as being desperate. Just like you, 61% of American Singles will look for a date online this year. That’s a lot of dates! So project a Happy you, sadness isn’t an attractive trait either.

Be Honest about Yourself

You can say you are as funny as Jim Carey or as hot as Pam Anderson, but if you’re not your potential date won’t be impressed. Remember that there is always the possibility you will take you online romance offline and meet face to face. So be honest, you’ll get great dates just being yourself.

Use a Spell Checker!

There is nothing worse than reading a profile of someone you think you might be interested in and very fourth word is incorrectly spelled. Sure, we’re not all great spellers, but you know that squiggly red line under half of your text, well, it’s there for a reason. Create your text in a word processor, then copy and paste it into your profile. This way you can save it and use it again if you sign up for more than one dating site. It will also allow you to tweak your profile from time to time.

Include a Photo

This one is a given – Upload a photo or two. As part of your profile, the photo is one of the most important parts. If you decide not to upload a photo, again you will not taken seriously. Even if you don’t consider yourself terribly attractive, believe me there are hundreds of people out there who will. Just think about this, When you’re reading someone’s profile, how important would it be to see a photo of that person?

Well, what you have above are the basics. You’re ready to get started. Hope these tips will help you to create an eye (date) catching profile.

Good Luck!

Article Source: iSnare.com

You could surprise your partner with this, or plan it together. Bring a blanket, finger foods (berries, raw vegetables with dip, chips, shrimp, pieces of fruit, etc.), a tape or CD player with batteries and romantic music, your favorite drinks and fly repellent. Great places for picnics are secluded fields, beaches at sunset, beside a lake or pond or under a tree. If you want to suprise your partner, set up the picnic ahead of time and ask your partner to go for a walk with you, make sure the walk leads to your picnic and let him or her discover your treat.

I live in a city where the “World Famous Reversing Falls” is located. I don’t know if it is really “World Famous” but all my life I’ve driven by it quite frequently…it wasn’t until two summers ago that I actually went and visited it from a tourist’s perspective. Something I’ve done in the past is to call the local tourist bureau and ask for ideas of places to go, they can be very helpful.

If you don’t have your own rollerblades there are places where you can rent them by the hour. Call a sports store and inquire about this, they may know the number to call.

Unless you know someone with horses you will probably have to go on a guided ride…you won’t get privacy but it is still fun.

Depending on where you live there might be places that rent cabins by the night. The cabins usually have fireplaces, nearby lakes (to fish in, swim in or canoe in) and nature trails.

Yes, “together”. What a great way to bond, you can talk about your day, or anything for that matter, and even play with your food. Mix up some cake batter and lick it off each other’s fingers.

Not familiar with this game? You take turns asking each other: “Truth, Dare, Double Dare?”, the other person picks one. If they pick “truth” you get to ask one question that they have to answer, if they pick “dare” you dare them to do something, and double dare means that you both have to do whatever is chosen as a dare. This is only limited by your imagination, for extra creativity you can add consequences…if one of you won’t do the dare or answer the question then you suffer whatever (fun) consequence you’ve come up with ahead of time.

Try “Chicken Soup for the Couple’s Soul“, or any of the Chicken Soup books for that matter.

You could shop, sightsee or visit friends.

This means no tent or tarp over you head.

If you don’t have a canoe, many camp grounds will rent them out. Exploring islands is very fun!

These are fun with a group of friends or you can have a private barbeque for two.

Then go home and make a pie.

Yeah. They all start getting married. It’s like a cult. Instead of handing out flowers at the airport, they’re handing out florists’ business cards and pictures of their receptions. You’ve rented more tuxedos or bought more bridesmaid dresses in the past year than you have in the past 10. Every weekend from Memorial Day to Halloween is booked with a shower, a party, a rehearsal dinner, a ceremony, a reception, or any combination of the above.

And, you’re single.

And feeling left out.

It’s easy to start to panic. To hear the ominous tones of a biological clock ticking. And, of course, to start picturing yourself at 80, alone and living with 600 cats. Your whole world starts to spin, and like some frantic game of “tag,” your friends are getting picked off right and left.

First to go are all the friends who’ve had the same sweetie for years. This is no big deal. You knew they going to be married back in 10th grade. Next are the people who always seemed to have a boyfriend or girlfriend, but changed ‘em every 8 months or so. You don’t have the highest expectations for their marriages, and you figure they’ll be single again soon, so you don’t panic then, either.

The real mania sets in when the losers of your group start getting hitched. You know who – the folks who could never get a date in high school. Or college. Or for 5 years afterwards. The people you always looked at and thought, “well, I know I won’t be single as long as THEM.”

Well, lookee here. The cheese stands alone.

And you venture from ceremony to ceremony, reception to reception, wondering what went wrong. Why your life sucks. And why you’ll never get married.

STOP IT. I don’t know if it’s the champagne, the cake, or the sappy music that does it, but your life doesn’t suck. Big deal if you’re not married yet, and have no prospects. As cliché ¡s it sounds, your time will come. You may feel like it, but you’re not in “the game of Life,” and you’re not racing to see who makes it to the end with a car, a house, and 2.6 kids.

Did you ever think, for a moment, how cool it is to be a single guy or gal at a wedding? It’s romantic. It’s sappy. You’re looking dapper, and dressed to the nines. And you’re available. Welcome to the ball, Cinderella!

Oh yes. The time is yours. You can work that room the way Sinatra worked Vegas.

So think about it that way. Ignore the visions of cats and scaring kids off your lawn. Love and romance aren’t about panicking and rushing into something because your kid sister got married before you did.

Eventually, love will find you, and you’ll find yourself a shiny ring and rock. You’ll walk down the aisle. And for those of you who think it’s a race, you’ll finally catch up.

…Until they all start having babies.

EEK!

We surveyed a variety of top experts and learned five unbelievably effective secrets to make the opposite sex come running.

Here’s how you can use them to work for you:

Be the Center of Attention

Want to be the one who gets noticed? Stand in the center of the
room. According to Dr. Albert Mehrabian, the author of several
books and nationally-known expert in the field of spacial psychology,
where you are in a room (and what you’re doing) has a lot to do with
your ability to attract the opposite sex. Where should you be for the
highest impact and the greatest number of interested cuties?
Smack-dab in the center of the room, standing up and moving around
a bit. (But don’t pace a track on the carpet for goodness sake…)

If you’re in a bar or nightclub, the best place to be is at one of the
corners on the bar. Not only will you meet more people, but,
according to Mehrabian, bartenters tend to gravitate toward the
corners as well. Interesting conversation AND a full drink? You’ll
feel like you’ve died and gone to dating heaven. The worst place
to be seen? Hanging out near the wall or sitting at a table. That
hot stranger approaching your table and asking “may I join you”
only happens in the movies.

The Color Lure

What color can you wear to compel the opposite sex to
approach you?

According to Color Consultant Leatrice Eiseman, Director of the
Pantone Color Institute and author of Colors For Your Every Mood,
women are attracted to men wearing the color blue. And why
wouldn’t we be? According to Eiseman, guys who frequently
wear blue are “stable, faithful, constant and always there.” The
blue guy is a fantastic candidate for a long-term relationship —
someone who’s dependable, momogomous and can match his
own clothes.

And what about the ladies? Eiseman says women should wear
a pink- peach to make themselves most approachable. The
color is “very flattering to most skin tones, it gives you healthy
glow,” and according to Eiseman, projects “a little vulnerability
which brings out something protective in men.”

Want to wear a color that weeds out guys who can’t handle
strong women? Try a deep red, burgundy or plum. Men who
aren’t attracted to strong women will steer clear.

Of all the colors, red is the most sensual. But, wear red with
caution. “Red is the color of sex and power,” says Eiseman.
Red adds an element of excitement and attracts two types of
men – men interested in sex, and men attracted to powerful
women. Sure, you’ll probably have to fend off a lot of freaks,
but you could also end up attracting a guy that isn’t threatened
by the fact that you make a bigger salary.

Concerned your wardrobe is driving people away? Stay away
from what Eiseman calls “squished caterpillar yellow-green”
which is said to repel both sexes equally.

Body Talk That Reels ‘Em In

How do you use body language to attract the opposite sex?
If you’re a woman, the key is to make yourself approachable.
According to nationally-respected body language expert and
professional speaker, Patti Wood, you want to make yourself a
“safe” (read approachable) target. How do you accomplish that?
Don’t take up a lot of space (which is a sign of power and superiority.)
Wood says, “we are strong women, but remember, we’re trying to
get a man to come over and talk to us.” She explains, “you have
to show you have room for someone else in your life.”

In addition, Wood says “to be very approachable women should
stand with their feet no farther than 6 inches apart with toes
pointed slightly inward. ” Other key moves, the nod and the head
tilt – signal you’re listening to what the other person has to say.

For men, appearing more dominant effectively draws the attraction
of women. To attract women, stand with your feet 6-10 inches apart,
and toes pointing outward. Feel free to take up some space. For
men who are victims of the “nice guy” badge, or who appear to be
too submissive to attract women, try taking your Y chromosome
out for a spin. According to Mehrabian, men should “try wearing
bulkier or more conservative hairstyles or clothing,” hold your
head up, and speed up your speech and gestures to be more
assertive.

Body language tips for both sexes: Don’t fold your arms and
don’t chew on gum, ice or your fingernails. According to Wood,
the chewing indicates anxiety or frustration, neither of which
are very attractive emotions.

The Power of a Smile

Psychology and body language experts agree that one of the
most important things you can do to make yourself more
attractive (and approachable) is to smile. Not a great big plastic
game-show smile, just your normal “I’m having a great time and
I’m happy to be here” face will do the trick. According to Wood,
“the smile is the international signal of friendliness.”

Tempting With Scent

Studies show that men associate the scents of cinnamon and
vanilla with love. To make the scents work for you, try baking
some ready-made cinnamon rolls about an hour before your
date arrives, or, wear a cinnamon-vanilla scented perfume
(there’s a fabulous one called “Man Magnet” at
www.stopgettingdumped.com.) Aromatherapy experts have
long-believed cinnamon to be an aphrodisiac. According to
Laura Davimes, aromatherapy and herb expert , and owner
of Herban Avenues, “certain aromatic plants exude oils similar
to our own sexual secretions or pheromones. Wearing
cinnamon/vanilla blends increases the presence of pheromone-like
substances and dramatically increases attraction.”

The scent of a woman? Women, according to a recent study,
are attracted to a black licorice scent. So, be sure to pick up
licorice or Good ‘n Plenty at the theater snack bar. And, if you’re
at a club and happen to spill a little Jaggermeister on your shirt,
don’t worry about the stain, just consider it your lucky night.

Men agree that one of the most attractive qualities in a woman is when she’s self-assured, likes herself, is comfortable with who she is, likes how she looks and most importantly, she’s happy. It’s impossible to be all those things when you’re shy or insecure. And being happy and being shy are two opposites.

Being shy is a state of mind and can be changed with practice. The more you describe yourself as shy, the more you believe it is who you are. Shyness stops you from having fun. I know because I used to be shy and insecure, thinking people would rather not have me around. I realized one day that I was being very self-centered. Shyness and insecurity means you’re worrying about how other people see YOU, how they feel about YOU, and how they judge YOU. Turn it around and begin to see that most people are shy (albeit at different degrees) and usually waiting for someone to make the first move. Don’t you admire those people who can go up to anyone, introduce themselves, and begin a conversation? Well, you can become that kind of person, the kind of person people enjoy having around.

Here’s how to get rid of that totally useless shyness that is holding you back from having what you want and being happy.

Stage One:

(Remember: They’re a little bit shy too and waiting for someone to make the first move.)

1. Practice smiling in front of the mirror. Often, when we’re shy we think we’re smiling but our mouths don’t show it.
2. Then begin smiling at strangers who don’t intimidate you.
3. When that becomes completely comfortable, start smiling at people who do intimidate you, like nice looking men, but not those who you’re attracted to. Then, start smiling at men you are attracted to.
4. Start saying hello to people who don’t intimidate you.
5. When that feels comfortable, start saying hello to people who do intimidate you, working up to the scariest.
6. Start complimenting people who don’t intimidate you. Find something about them like a color they’re wearing, a dress, a tie, whatever. It doesn’t matter as long as your intention is to sincerely make them feel good.
7. Compliment scarier and scarier people as you become comfortable with each new level.
8. Start flirting with people who don’t intimidate you. I don’t mean sexual fliring. I mean get them to laugh, play with them, compliment them and tease them in nice ways. A great way to learn to flirt in this way is to start with kids. The same kinds of silly, friendly things you can say to a child (or even a cute dog) is what Friendly Flirting is all about.
9. Flirt with scarier and scarier people. Learn how fun it can be to bring smiles and laughter into people’s lives. You don’t have to be a comedian to get people to laugh. Watch others, rent movies that have people who act like what I’m talking about and practice til it’s comfortable. And always practice each new level on people who are completely unintimidating to you.
   

Stage Two:

(Remember: They’re a little bit shy too and waiting for someone to make the first move.)

1. Start conversations with strangers who don’t intimidate you: People in line with you at the supermarket, people in parks, waitresses, secretaries. Whenever you want to practice, go out and find someone to talk to. Watch what other people talk about. Notice things around you. Make comments, ask questions.
2. As you become more comfortable, start conversations with scarier and scarier people.
3. Now that you’re pretty comfortable with other people, start walking up to people (when it’s appropriate) and introduce yourself and begin a conversation. It’s all about intention. Wanting to bad enough…and lots of practice.
4. If you practice all these steps, I gurantee you’ll get over most, if not all, of your shyness. Sure, everyone gets insecure and intimidated occasionally, but they simply acknowledge the feeling and go ahead and do it anyway. You can do this if you really want to. It’s up to you to put in the time and work. But trust me, because this is how I got over being shy, it works.

At family get-togethers you get grilled about what’s going on in the “romance department.” In-laws, whose company you cherished all year long, become reminders that you don’t have a “special someone.” No singles shopping for gifts appear in the barrage of holiday commercials. If you are single, and not dating anyone, these holiday images can lead to emotions ranging from sadness to depression.

So, what is the best way to combat the holiday blues? Although the following strategies can be applied throughout the year, they are particularly useful during the holidays.

Don’t deny your feelings.

Emotions are neither right nor wrong. They are just how you feel about your situation. Allow yourself to be sad, without the guilt. However, be conscious of how you act on your feelings. Actions to emotions can be right or wrong. Anticipate before going to family events how you will handle dating status questions. It’s best to have a pre-planned strategy of how to politely change the subject. When asked about your love life, a simple, “There’s no news in that area, but here’s what I am doing at work”, might be just enough to redirect the conversation.

Adjust your view.

See the couples in your life as you have seen them throughout the year. They haven’t really changed. Only the environment in which you see them has altered. Anticipate whom you will be meeting during holiday events. Have fond memories ready to share. Take time to remember and cherish why they mean so much to you.

Be a successful single.

A life partner enhances who you are – they do not “complete” you. Understand that you do not need another person to make your life whole. Take this time to discover what the holidays really mean to you and start your own holiday traditions that reflect your personal values. Realize and appreciate that this is a stage in your life – not a reflection of who you are.

Break traditions.

Who says you have to spend the holidays a certain way? Maybe serving meals at the homeless shelter is more in keeping with your values, than “shopping till your drop.” Take some of the time you would spend with family and share it with the folks at your local nursing home. It is easier to justify limiting your time at the uncomfortable holiday functions when you have a good excuse.

Change your latitude.

If visiting the family or attending holiday functions is really going to be overwhelming, cut your visits short and take a single’s cruise or an island vacation. Let the couples be reminded of the benefits of being able to pick up and go.

Limit or avoid alcohol.

Alcohol is a depressant and will intensify your feelings of sadness. Accept that you are feeling sad and handle the emotion as you would any time during the year. Do things that will bring humor into your life. Rent funny movies to offset the holiday features that are shown this time of year.

Give yourself the gift of home.

If you have not made your house or apartment your home, consider doing so. Fill your home with things that reflect who you are. Many single’s homes are nothing more than storage for their “stuff”. The art you choose says, “This is me.” Buy some. Add some color to your home. Let gift givers know what you would like for your home. Set needs aside for once and focus on wants.

Being single during the holidays can be difficult, but it doesn’t have to be traumatic. Anticipate bumps in the road and plan accordingly. Take ownership of the holidays and create your own traditions. Limit your time at holiday events that bring discomfort by volunteering for local organizations. Remember, there are no set rules for how to enjoy the season – find out what works for you and “have a happy holiday.”

But having given it some thought, I wanted to come clean with you about something.

It’s not like every single date was a blissful stream of perfection.

Sure, I met lots of great women and had a blast for several years…culminating in meeting Emily on Match.com.

But along the way, especially at the beginning, I certainly encountered my share of sometimes hilarious and sometimes downright nightmarish situations.

Here are the four most memorable ones

1) Not What The Doctor Prescribed

Very shortly after my divorce in 1992, I received a “spam” message in my inbox that I actually responded to. Believe it or not, I hadn’t even heard of online dating before. This ad claimed I could meet the woman of my dreams on their site, so I was intrigued.

The next thing you know, I had ponied up however much they charged and began looking through the pictures of women they had listed.

To be honest, this was not exactly the most well-traveled site on the ‘net. Who knew there was a Match.com out there? So inevitably, I found exactly one woman who seemed interesting to me–a brown-eyed blondie with a friendly smile.

I emailed her, probably with something lame like “You seem nice. Maybe we could get along. Would you like to talk?”. Remember, this was Day One for me in the online dating world.

Call it “beginner’s luck, but she wrote back. Crazy, huh?

Well, one thing led to another, and there we were sitting across the table from one another at dinner. The fact that I shouldn’t have been paying for dinners here has long since been duly noted and is sort of beside the point, so please overlook that for now and read on.

Midway through dinner, she starts talking about her medical problems.

Never talk about your medical problems on a first date. I don’t care if you’ve known the person for ten years, let alone ten minutes.

Between bites of whatever I was eating, she was bragging about how she had chronic kidney stone issues and how tough she was for being able to pass them without even flinching nowadays.

Unfortunately, she took my casual attempt to divert the discussion as disbelief.

“You don’t believe I get kidney stones? Here…look…”

Already having started digging in her purse, she soon produced a small medicine vial.

I thought to myself, “This chick has to be kidding. I believe her, already. She doesn’t have to prove her case by showing me her prescription.”

I should have been so lucky.

Pressing down and twisting the child-proof cap, the bottle opened and the contents were soon poured into her hand.

“See, look at this…it has to be at least the size of a pea, right?”

With a freshly French-manicured thumb and forefinger, she produced the largest unit from an impressive collection of similar objects she was holding.

Yes. It was the largest kidney stone she had ever passed.

This woman collected her kidney stones. And she took them with her everywhere, apparently.

I don’t remember what I said or did, really. But I do remember there was a second date, believe it or not.

2) Not A Strip Mall, Sweetie

Not long after the “kidney stone chick”, I met another woman from the same site. She was a Hispanic cutie with perfect skin and a booty that would have made Sir Mix-A-Lot slam on the brakes. She said “sweetie” a lot.

I hadn’t learned the part about not taking women to expensive dinners on first dates yet, so there were at one of the nicer sushi joints in San Antonio.

She was terrific. She was intelligent and loved to laugh. Above and beyond that, she was a great flirt. Clearly she was digging me.

We had ordered two glasses of red wine, and conversation turned to what she did for a living.

“So you said you were ’self-employed’. What exactly do you do?”, I asked.

While she answered, I took a sip of Merlot. And it was right then that I discovered that all those slapstick “spit takes” you see on old-school comedy sketches are rooted in factual reality.

It took all I had in reserve not to spew grape juice all over everything.

“I run a chain of strip clubs, Sweetie.”, she had announced matter-of-factly.

Sitting before me was a decidedly classy woman, who I had picked up from a decent home in a nice neighborhood.

“You mean, like a strip mall…right…with the nail salons, a tanning place and a chinese restaurant.”

“No, silly! LOL! I mean like…you know…strip clubs. The kind with girls.”

Now if you know my style at all by now, you already realize the date was as good as over.

Yet, it was like a train wreck. I couldn’t look away.

And I asked the inevitable question.

“Yes, well…my ex ran the day-to-day operations and I pretty much handled the books. But he let the ‘interview process’ go a little too far too often, and I couldn’t trust him anymore. I got the business in the divorce settlement.”

It was then, I told her the truth.

“I’ve never been to one of those places in my life, and I see no reason to start now.”

Uh oh.

I may has well have lit a roman candle. That chick practically attacked me as soon as we left the restaurant. I tried to handle things as best as I knew how at the time, but let’s just say she wasn’t a happy camper.

When I got home, she had already e-mailed me the buck-naked pics from her “Adult Friendfinder” profile (which was my first introduction to that particular reality). “This is what you missed out on. GOOD LUCK!!!” was the only line accompanying the pics.

3) June Carter Cash Or Charge

I should have known better, considering the one pic she had attached to her profile was a blurry one.

And in my heart of hearts, I really did know better. Suspecting this particular date may not go so well, I invited her to dinner (yeah, yeah…hardheaded wasn’t I?) at 5.30p.

I walked into the Chili’s or TGIFridays or whatever it was, and immediately got that nauseous feeling that every single online dater experiences at one point or another. Specifically, the one where you see someone waiting alone at a table over there who vaguely resembles the person you were expecting to meet about as much as a piece of burnt toast resembles the perfectly good slice of bread you threw in the toaster and forgot about.

My honest-to-goodness first thought was, “OMG…who replaced the woman with the nice smile in the profile with June Carter Cash!”

I was too much of a “Mr. Nice Guy” to turn tail and skip town immediately, so I gathered my intestinal fortitude and approached the table.

Conversation was stilted from the very beginning. She began to make a feeble attempt at flirting.

The woman was at least 55 years old. And not a very attractive 55-year-old at that.

She was dressed in solid black stuff with lots of stainless steel crap and fringes on it, like she was some dust-farting legend from “The Grand Ole’ Opry” or something.

The thickness of her Texas accent was eclipsed only by the thickness of her black eyeliner.

Finally, she excused herself to the ladies room, offering me a blessed reprieve from impending regurgitation.

It was then the waiter came to the table asking me if I wanted another beer. “NO!” I proclaimed, soon apologizing for the brusque tone neither he nor I had anticipated.”

“OK, um…how about your mom?

“What?”

“Would your mom like another beer?”

Suddenly reminded that one must take oneself much less seriously in order to derive the greatest enjoyment out of life, I burst out laughing.

I was still recovering when Mrs. Cash returned to the table.

Having ordered a small garden salad (after all, who could eat?), my focus pretty much turned to saying as little as possible in hopes that she would friggin’ finish eating.

I had already called for the check and ended up excusing myself to go find the waiter and pay it, already.

Finally, leaving, I parted ways with her at the table and wished her well. There was no way I was going to risk the awkwardness of walking her to her car. My inherent sense of chivalry was in fact overwhelmed by utter disgust, without apology.

Arriving home at the advanced hour of 6:30, I was greeted once again by a “post date” e-mail. In her vitriolic message to me, Mrs. Cash had “charged” me with a series of offenses that clearly roused her deepest sense of hurt and anger. Among the more particularly hilarious ones was the pronouncement that I was “obviously gay” because I failed to see her as attractive.

Were she the last woman on earth, she may have been right about that.

Incidentally, I finally learned my lesson and quit that particular dating site…forever.

4) Cook For Your Drunk

She was a very cute kindergarten teacher of Lebanese ethnicity. She was also a total sweetheart. Realizing her pics consistently got 9.5s on HotOrNot.com, I threw the dice and let her come to my place so I could cook for her.

There were no disappointments. She was exactly my type. And she was already being touchy/feelie/smiley enough that I knew this was going to go really well.

I mixed her an “Apple-tini”.

“Oh my! This is GOOOD!” she said. Noticing her glass was empty, I refreshed it for her.

The glass was empty again the next time I looked over at her. Right then, making eye contact with her, she skipped over to me, threw her arms around my neck and started biting me with a giggle.

This chick was perhaps 110 pounds with a full tank of fuel. (in other words, she was probably 110 pounds at that moment). So I decided maybe two drinks were enough.

But nevertheless, when I wasn’t paying attention she had found some raspberry stuff in my stash and had begun mixing vodka with it.

Ten minutes later, dinner was finished…and it was spectacular, if I may say so myself.

But she was nowhere to be found.

It was then I remembered she had excused herself to the bathroom.

I went to check on her and she had vomited (thankfully with tremendously accurate aim) into the commode, and was presently passed out on the floor. Whatever.

Managing to wake her up, her groggy self agreed to let me carry her to the bedroom and let her sleep it off…which she did.

I ate dinner alone, watching SportsCenter. The Spurs had lost, no less.

She woke up 8 hours later, found me asleep on the couch, and had made me breakfast by the time I woke up. It was a great breakfast. She clearly had a sense that I was a man whom she could feel safe with. There was a second date.

Obviously, I learned some things from my early online dating misadventures. My evening with the Lebanese cutie actually happened about six months before I met Emily, so that only proves you gotta stay on your toes at all times. Actually, that one was probably less of an “online dating disaster” per se and more of an issue of guarding my liquor stash from pent-up school teachers!